South Orange Mayor Sheena Collum’s grandmother, Bok Soon Park, born January 24, 1922, passed away late Wednesday evening, September 11, at the age of 102.
Collum, who led a virtual town hall on an upcoming water utility referendum earlier in the evening, was by the side of her halmeoni (할머니) — Korean for grandma — and posted this loving tribute on Facebook:
From Sheena Collum:
The OG of my Korean Ninja Clan went to heaven last night. Bok Soon Park January 24, 1922 – September 11, 2024 (102 years-old). I called her halmeoni (할머니), which is “grandma.”
After losing her husband at a young age, she worked to bring all five of her children to this incredible place called America. My aunts and uncle ranged in age from their teens to early 20s. She didn’t have the money to bring everyone at once, so they came at different times, and she was in the last group with the two youngest. When she arrived, she didn’t speak English and ultimately never did, but we knew how to communicate. I was told she worked in a cafeteria for a bit at Ethicon…not surprising because she owned the kitchen. Sadly, she buried two of her children while in this country, one aunt and one uncle, but was surrounded by their children these past few days.
She lived with my family for a couple years when I was really really young, and the little Korean I know are phrases she would say to get me out of bed in the morning and tell me to wash my face, brush my teeth, and hurry to catch the bus. I came home one day from school and found her outside with a shovel, and she was trying to dig herself a vegetable garden. She was a very determined woman. In the past few years, when I would visit, we would play cards (“hwa-tu”), and she never let me win, a total boss in a flower dress who looked unassuming until we would play for money, lol.
My mom and aunts would always tell me she was very proud of me, which is a nice feeling – especially since everything I’ve done or will ever do in this world started with the decisions she made for her family to give them a better life. I’m alive and here because of her.
This is my first direct experience watching a loved one die and the process of active dying. I’ve learned an incredible amount of information and am truly grateful to the hospice workers.
I’m lucky that I got to spend the last week with her and hold her hand. While she was physically unresponsive, she totally knew her family was all around her. I decorated her room with pictures of her children and family. She was also staunchly religious, so I found a candle with Jesus on it and put it beside her bed.
She held on for the past several days, and I know exactly what she was doing. She wanted to see our family come together. She wanted to know that her last act on earth as our Matriarch was to reinforce “family” and that whatever little differences or squabbles or feelings of the past were not important, and that the love we share always needs to come first because life is too damn short.
I said my final goodnight to my halmeoni at 11 pm last night, thanked her for being the best grandmother in the world, and told her that the family was gonna be okay.
