It’s a tough position to be in: You’re new to town. You don’t know anyone. You need a babysitter desperately.
Over the summer, Village Green was contacted by a local parent concerned about a babysitter who had allegedly scammed a local family out of personal belongings, financial information and personal identification information.
While Village Green continues to follow this case (the mother involved does not wish for her name to be used publicly), we wanted to share some tips and advice from this mother, as well as local police, with our readers.
The mom involved said that she had found the sitter on local social media, in “an ad by a ‘mom’ raving about this nanny and they were moving out of town.”
In hindsight, she said, there were “tells” that the ad was fake: “Her grammar is awful. There is never any punctuation.” She said that these fake ads often mentioned that the babysitter was good with newborns — including twins or triplets — and that, although her current employers were very happy with her, they were moving and couldn’t take a nanny with them.
Det. Lt. Jimmy DeVaul of the Maplewood Police had these words of advice:
“First conduct a phone interview with the person. Obtain their personal information to further contact them. Have them provide references and verify them before or if you decide to interview them in person in a public place first like a park or coffee shop. This should be simple and straightforward; if not be careful it could be a scam. Do not go back and fourth with emails, it should not be complicated.”
The mom we talked to did check references, but said, “In hindsight, I should have trusted my gut.” The two referrals she recalled “didn’t sound like local moms. It turns out they were probably her friends or her. They didn’t seem like terribly sophisticated people. One had four-year-old triplets.”
The mother said this sitter “preys on people new to town” and “positions herself as old hat — she knows everything about the towns.”
DeVaul also cautioned parents to beware of responding to potential sitters online. “Do not send money. Do not accept money, checks or any other type of payment. Do not be fooled by crazy stories or requests.” And finally, “Don’t ever provide personal information.”
However, this local mom’s situation points to a need for further vetting — actually knowing the references or finding someone to check the references on the references.
It’s a lot of work for new parents who are under pressure — and is difficult for those who are new to town and don’t know many people. Parents are also competing with a lot of other new parents in Maplewood and South Orange for a limited pool of babysitters.
One resource for new moms in town is SOMA Families Meetup, which has a Facebook page and runs weekly meetings for new mothers at The Rack on Springfield Avenue. When Village Green visited the group in September, new moms were talking about the need for sleep, food and showering — but were also networking about sitters and play groups.
Recently, the South Orange-Maplewood Community Coalition on Race hosted its annual Preschool Open Houses, which included a number of day care providers which accept infants and toddlers — such as Totri Childcare, Tutor Time Childcare, the South Mountain YMCA, and more. Some have waiting lists, but parents should check them out. See the list here.
Despite the desperate need to find a sitter, the message from parents and police alike seems to be “slow down and take your time.”
